Toilet training is a major milestone in a child’s development, marking the transition from nappies to greater independence. While the process can feel overwhelming, understanding when to start, what skills are needed, and how to approach it can make the journey smoother for both you and your child.
Here are some practical tips and strategies that can help make the toilet training process smoother and more successful:
1. Establish A Consistent Toilet Routine
Routine is key to success in toilet training. Children, especially neurodivergent children, thrive when they know what to expect. Setting up a predictable routine will help your child understand when it’s time to try using the toilet and build their body’s natural cues for needing to go. Here’s how to establish a routine:
- Choose specific times for bathroom visits: Encourage bathroom trips first thing in the morning, after meals, before naps, and before bed. These are natural times when your child may feel the urge to go.
- Set regular intervals: For example, every 1-2 hours, even if your child doesn’t say they need to go. This builds an awareness of their bladder and bowel habits.
- Use visual timers or cues: Visual schedules or a timer can remind both you and your child that it’s time for a bathroom visit. This is especially helpful for children who may not yet verbalize when they need to go.
Encourage Night-time Training Separately: Daytime toilet training usually happens first, with night-time dryness taking longer to develop. Many children continue wearing nappies or training pants at night for a while, and that’s completely normal.
2. Understand Your Child’s Drinking And Bathroom Patterns
A crucial part of toilet training is understanding your child’s body. Monitoring your child’s drinking habits and bathroom patterns will help you better anticipate when they may need to go.
- Track how much your child drinks: Pay attention to how much water or fluid your child is consuming and at what times of the day. This will help you predict when they’re likely to need the toilet.
- Observe patterns: Notice when your child typically goes to the bathroom. Do they need to go after meals, after waking up, or at certain times of day? Understanding their natural rhythm will help you plan bathroom visits.
3. Create A Comfortable And Supportive Bathroom Environment
Setting up the bathroom environment can help your child feel comfortable and more willing to use the toilet. Here’s what you can do to make the bathroom more inviting:
- Use a child-friendly toilet setup: Ensure your child can easily access the toilet or potty. If they’re too small to use the regular toilet, consider a potty seat or child-sized toilet.
- Provide sensory-friendly accommodations: Some children may have sensory sensitivities to certain textures, sounds, or even the brightness of lights in the bathroom. Adjust the environment to make your child feel comfortable, for example: using soft toilet paper, dimming the lights, or using a quieter toilet seat.
- Encourage privacy and comfort: Some children may feel shy or anxious about using the toilet. Provide privacy by ensuring they have their own space and the bathroom is calm and inviting.
- Dress for success: Choose clothing that is easy for your child to remove independently, such as elastic waistbands rather than tricky buttons or zips.
4. Increase Exposure Through Visuals, Videos, And Social Stories
Exposure to the concept of toilet training is important for children to understand what’s expected of them. Using visuals, stories, and videos can help normalise the process and give them a sense of control.
- Show videos and social stories: Find age-appropriate videos or social stories that explain the toilet training process. These resources can help your child visualise what happens during toilet training and prepare them for the next steps.
- Use visual aids: Picture schedules or charts can break down the toilet training process into clear, understandable steps for your child. This can include steps like pulling down pants, sitting on the toilet, wiping, and flushing.
- Talk about it regularly: The more you talk about using the toilet, the more familiar it will feel for your child. Use everyday opportunities to mention using the bathroom, especially if you’re out in public or when other people around you go to the toilet.
5. Reinforce Positive Behaviour With Praise And Rewards
Positive reinforcement can go a long way in encouraging your child to continue learning. Celebrate each success, no matter how small, to motivate your child.
- Give lots of praise: Verbal praise like “Great job!” or “You did it!” can be very motivating for children. Be specific about what they did well, such as “You remembered to go to the toilet after lunch!”
- Use rewards: Some children respond well to tangible rewards, like a sticker chart or small treats. Use these as positive reinforcement for successes, but make sure to gradually phase them out as your child gets more consistent.
- Expect Accidents (and Stay Calm!) Accidents are a normal part of the process. Avoid punishment, and instead, offer reassurance and encourage your child to try again next time.
6. Recognise Signs Of Readiness And Be Flexible
It’s important to recognise when your child is ready for toilet training. Pushing your child before they’re ready can lead to frustration for both of you. Look for signs of readiness such as:
- Showing interest in using the toilet or wearing underwear
- Staying dry for longer periods
- Following simple instructions
- Indicating when they need to go (either verbally or non-verbally)
However, even if your child shows readiness, the process still requires patience. If your child regresses or seems resistant, it’s okay to take a step back and try again later. Flexibility is key.
7. Use Positive Language And Open Communication
It’s important to approach toilet training with a positive, encouraging attitude. Avoid using negative language like “accidents” or “bad,” as this can create unnecessary anxiety. Instead, use language that celebrates their progress and helps them feel empowered.
- Talk about toilet training openly: Regularly discuss the process with your child. Let them know that everyone goes to the toilet and that it’s part of growing up.
- Be encouraging after accidents: Accidents will happen, and that’s okay. When they do occur, stay calm and simply remind your child what to do next time. Offer comfort and reassurance.
Give It Time, It’s a Process
Toilet training is not a race. Every child will progress at their own pace, and it’s important to give them the time and space to learn. Some children may take days, weeks, or even months to fully grasp the concept, and that’s perfectly okay. The key is consistency, patience, and providing lots of support along the way.
Toilet training is a big step towards independence, and patience is key. Celebrate small wins, embrace setbacks as learning opportunities, and support your child through the process. Every child’s journey is different, so trust their pace and your instincts. With consistency, encouragement, and the right approach, your child will get there in their own time!